Extravagant Love

My husband is not a showy, extravagant man. He is an introvert and a very private person. I am not. We joke about how I like to have a birthday “month” to celebrate, not a birth-day. He, on the other hand, is happy to receive nothing – no fuss, no stress, just quiet time with those closest to him.

So, with Father’s Day today, or any special occasion for that matter, how do I show him that I love him? How do I unveil my devotion and thoughtfulness, my very heart for the most special man in my life – my child’s father? Without the big parties, lots of friends, lots of gifts – how one celebrates “quietly” is still quite ambiguous in my extroverted mind.

I made the decision that I would serve him – do something for him. I thought that was quite a lovely idea myself…but an idea can be very wonderful until you actually have to do something about it. I had bought him a basket of some of his very favorite treats, a baby boy onesie that had “Daddy’s buddy” on it (do you realize just how few baby boy clothes there are in comparison to that of girls? It was very difficult to find something that seems to me would be so simple!). And to complete it all, I told him I would do one of the chores he has been putting off – mow the lawn.

Now, to be clear, our house sits on top of a hill. At nearly 20 weeks pregnant, it seems like Mt. Everest. Hubby tends to get the front yard done in about 40 minutes. I have mowed lawns before so this couldn’t be that bad, right? I need the exercise anyway, I reasoned with myself. How bad could this be?

For starters, our grass was a little higher than I realized once I had to walk through it to get to the shed where the mower was. Up to my ankles, I imagined all sorts of copperheads, black snakes, rattlesnakes (do we even have those here?) waiting for their next meal – ME. Once I found my way to the shed (which I had never opened myself in my 1.5 years of living here) I had to pull out the mower. And this shouldn’t have been that hard, except there were spiders, webs, and spider eggs in every nook and cranny of that old shed. (Had it really been that long since we mowed our lawn last?)

Ok, so it's not Everest...but it's close!

After waging war with what seemed like Ripley’s Believe it or Not of creepy insects gathered in our shed, I then pushed the mower to the front yard. It started much easier than anticipated, and I began my Great Act of Love for My Husband (Yes, you should have heard trumpets and horns announcing the commencement of this great deed)! All was well until I realized that what went down the hill had to go back up the hill. And, halfway up the hill, I began to rethink how much I loved him. I pushed and pushed, got prodded by trees and sticks from the bushes, had to pull the mower backwards when I got stuck in the trees going downhill (which is not as easy as it sounds); by the end of it all, I was green. I was covered head to toe in grass clippings, dirt, and sweat (where did that come from? It wasn’t even hot!) and God only knows what kind of bugs were on me. I was panting and exhausted. I looked at the time, and it had taken me nearly an hour and a half. And that was just the front yard.

I wasn't kidding -
I sweat worse than spin class!

With my final push of energy, I parked that mower in front of the garage and decided that hubby can wage war against the shed and all its Pandora's Box of hidden creatures when he got home. I was DONE. Sorry back yard- today is not your day.

Once I was inside, and began to recuperate, I began to think about how hard this task of love was. It was supposed to be simple. He made it look so easy. Sure, mowing can’t be anyone’s favorite chore, but he always did it. Without complaining. I had no idea how much effort this took. And when I told him what I did, sure he appreciated it, but he wasn’t the least bit surprised when I told him –over and over again – how hard those inclines were, how many spiders there were, or how difficult it can be to get the edges lined up with the tree line without getting sucked into the trees. And that told me something else…

If he does this all the time, what other things does he do that I take for granted? I began recounting all the little acts of service that he does – dishes every night, taking out the trash, taking care of the pets, paying the bills, making sure our cars are maintained…he never asks for recognition, or for appreciation. He never complains that it has to be done. He just does it. And why? Because he loves me. Because he loves his family.

And how many times do I neglect to thank him? To somehow reciprocate that love? To under value him. Maybe not consciously, but I know that I do.

After pondering this for quite some time, I wondered how many others do I fail to demonstrate my love? I thought of all the people in my life who I have taken for granted. And then I thought of this verse:

“Consider the kind of extravagant love the father has lavished on us- He calls us children of God! It’s true; we are his beloved children.” 1 John 3:1

How guilty am I of taking Him – HIM, GOD, the Savior – for granted?? How much has he done for me that I have ignored, doubted, or disregarded? The sun rises and sets every day. Birds chirp and make glorious melodies. He has brought me joy in place of my pain; He has healed me and helped me. He alone has taken the broken pieces of my life and somehow made something so very beautiful from them. I am kept safe and secure as I go about my daily routine and do I even say thank you? Do I acknowledge in my heart the gratefulness and adoration I have for the One who has done everything for me? Sadly, no; at least not like I should. And yet, how many times have I sought credit for the littlest thing I have done for Him?

How do I repay Him? How do I show God – who is the very definition of love itself – that I love Him? The answer is Love. Love openly and honestly, and with abandon. Especially to those who don’t deserve it. Demonstrate extravagant love to them. Because that is how He loves me. That is how He loves us.

Even if you are without an earthly father this weekend, or had a poor example of a father, you can be sure that there is One who loves you. Truly. Madly. Deeply. And with a love that is far greater, far stronger, far purer than any love you have ever known or will ever known. And He doesn’t care how you come to Him – just come. He asks for nothing from you and will love you whether you love Him in return. He always has, and He always will. That is just who God is.

Thank you God for loving me. Thank you for constantly showing me Your perfect love, even when I ignore and refuse to see. Thank you for those in my life who are physical representations of Your love. Forgive me for not acknowledging You more often and taking this love for granted. And give me the heart and boldness to love like you love – extravagantly, abundantly, and freely. Amen.

So blessed to be loved extravagantly by both him and God